Si…

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If…

• You made a mistake 20 rows earlier
  (We’re talking about more or less an hour and a half of work, if you were wondering) and you are really considering scissors, or maybe setting it on fire… But your only available scissors are those crappy dollar store scissors, impossible you can cut through anything with that shit. So if somebody could tell me where the fuck are the matches, that’d be great.

• You just finished your project
  and the idea of weaving in all those ends are as appealing as sticking a needle in your eye.

• You’ve been procrastinating for hours
  You’re looking at your project as if it’s a bad project. Bad project. Lay down, project! You’re watching tv and just one more episode and I will work on it! But suddenly, Netflix asks if you’re still watching and you realize that you’ve been binging This is us for 3 hours. Shit. (let’s be honest here, this was worth it because holy shit this show is so good!!!)

• You’re trying to cake your new hank of yarn yourself,
  but too bad, you don’t own a swift (yes, you know, that umbrella thingy that spins to make cakes… yes, that thing!) you never bought one because I-don’t-need-one-of-those-I-know-how-to-cake-by-hand! Let me laugh… So you’re trying as best as you can to make do between two chairs or between your feet. Honey, could you hold that in the air for me please. Make sure it does not fall! No, not like that, you’ll get it tangled. I said NOT LIKE THAT, IT’LL GET… eh shit. So those matches, are they coming?

Congratulations, you really need a break!

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You’re welcome.

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